


Don't Look Back

by Ultra



Category: Leverage
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Love, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-06
Updated: 2011-12-06
Packaged: 2020-02-29 15:39:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18781213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ultra/pseuds/Ultra
Summary: '“Don’t look back,” she whispered, tears in her eyes and a shake in her voice, before she pressed her lips to his one last time and slowly turned away.'





	Don't Look Back

**Author's Note:**

> originally written for fleurlb on Livejournal for a prompt meme.

It never quite felt like the end. Never a goodbye, just an ‘au revoir’ until the time came for them to meet again. There was a connection that neither of them could explain from the very beginning. She intrigued him and he challenged her, something they both needed but could never explain why. Through chases across continents, bullets traded, deals cut, the dance went on, breaking off for a while here and there, but never truly over.

There had never been a dead end, only a cross-roads where a new direction must be chosen. All roads led back to each other, one way or another, and once again he had made it true that day in Chicago when he tracked her down. It had been a long time, two years at least, and a lot had changed, especially for him.

It ought to have been easier to stay than ever. Though he was broken, she had always wanted to be the one to fix him, to save him. With no wife to take that position anymore, Sophie was free to be Nate’s saviour if he would allow, but he denied her.

Of course she thought of walking away, even then. She warned him the team would up and leave but she was thinking more of herself even as the words fell from her trembling lips. She knew the sensible thing for both of them was not even to walk away but to run as fast as their legs would take them. Still she stayed, stayed too long, until she felt she was drowning.

He gave her hope, though Nate wasn’t sure he ever intended to do such a thing. A simple touch, a kiss on the cheek, a word of encouragement. There was a part deep inside of him that was so very aware he was playing with fire, and yet for the most part he allowed himself to ignore it. His drinking would not just be the death of him but the end of any chance he could ever have of making Sophie happy, and via her improve his own life, yet he could not stop.

When the team left LA, he had to let her go, he had no choice. Though standing back to back with a woman he could need, could care for, could love, knowing there was no option about turning around and rushing to the safety of her embrace, it was one of the hardest moments of his life.

 

The reunion was for family, not romance. The team were back together again before six months were out and Boston had placed itself firmly back into Nate’s life. He was raised here, it was home, and yet had not felt quite complete until he looked across the bar at Sophie sat on the stool with a drink in her hand. Her presence was what truly made a home for him, though such sentiments had never passed his lips. He could not deserve Sophie Devereaux and he could not begin to try.

By this time, she thought she could handle it. Nate wasn’t drinking, the team were back together, everything ought to be peachy. Sophie soon regretted her plans to reunite, repair, rebuild, to look for a romance and a relationship amongst the ruins of what she and Nate had tried before and failed to successfully build. The drink did not bring out his bad side, if anything it hid a little of the bitterness that lived within. Of course, she saw through it, to the heart beneath and she longed to look deeper and find her named inscribed upon it. She never quite dared.

 

Perhaps it was foolish to run as she did, but he hadn’t exactly given her a reason to stay. She wasn’t expecting hearts and flowers, a string quartet, a basket full of white doves. Honestly, Sophie wasn’t entirely sure what she had wanted, or if she even would have known it if it was given to her. She struggled so much to come to terms with who she was and where she fit and whether or not she and Nate could ever truly be right together, however much they wanted it.

Wherever she wandered on her break away, no place was home, and never would be. Nate had to be there for the sentiment to ring true and finding her way back to him had been inevitable from the start. His leaving her almost immediately hadn’t been planned, but was somewhat more unavoidable than her own exit, stage left.

 

Prison, and after, and the jobs, and the team. Her real name, his ex-wife, the past and the present and the future spinning around. They came and went too many times, the two of them. Literally and figuratively, getting close and drifting apart.

It couldn’t go on forever, and they both knew it. Neither of them could stand the pain or the joy that would be lost each time it was found. The family they had here could not sustain indefinitely and too soon the day came when they must part ways for the final time. Eliot, Parker, and Hardison were already gone, off to their own corners of the world, and now came the final goodbye.

Sophie knew she shouldn’t make it harder on either of them, but she could not help herself, and Nate didn’t exactly argue as she pushed herself into his arms and held on tight. They still didn’t say goodbye, but the looks were enough to break hearts when they started to let go.

“Don’t look back,” she whispered, tears in her eyes and a shake in her voice, before she pressed her lips to his one last time and slowly turned away.

They both began walking, one step then two, a few more paces, before they could stand it no longer. Barely ten feet apart, they both turned around almost as one, and then they were running and she was back in his arms, and the world fell away when he kissed her and promised her the world.

They couldn’t leave, not this time, not either of them, and they would never try again.


End file.
